


Late Night Worries

by juminswhore



Category: Mystic Messenger
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 08:04:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20793365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juminswhore/pseuds/juminswhore
Summary: The moon has risen and Jumin can't help but have worrisome thoughts about you.





	Late Night Worries

I feel so cold. I want to take you into my lap and hold you tightly but you’re sleeping so soundly I can’t bare to wake you. The covers are strewn about you, I feel too hot under them but so cold outside of them. I can’t help but admire you, watch you and your every breath. Your hair is strewn about the pillow you always sleep with. Your hands lay against the bed, open. I feel nervous seeing you without your ring on. You’ve promised yourself to a broken man. Haven’t you realized that yet? Will you want to marry me still when you wake up one day and realize I’m not worthy of you?  
I’m so worried you’ll leave me one day.  
I’ve been up all night haunted by these thoughts. I want to be comforted by you more than anything. I finally decide that I’m too selfish, I can’t torture myself anymore. I pull the blankets away from your body slowly, I see you sensing the sudden chill in your sleep. Perhaps I will be enough to keep you warm. Maybe I will be useful then. You never ask for anything. Not one thing. Why?  
I slip my arms around you and pull you up against me, waking you in the process. “I’m sorry, my love, I didn’t intend to wake you. Close your eyes, I’ll take care of you.”  
I pull your body into mine, tucking you against my chest, your head just beneath mine. I rub my free hand up and down your body, you must be so cold. I’m burning inside, though. How can I make you stay forever? Will you too leave me one day? I thought I would be satisfied with the ring on your finger, but when you go to bathe or sleep and it comes off I feel nervous. I realize how I can’t protect you from everything. I can’t keep you locked away forever. Only when the sun has set and the moon has risen can I be fulfilled. By locking the door I feel safe with you. You always greet me after work, making the day’s troubles worthwhile. The way you hug me, holding me snugly, you make me feel secure, loved. Do you know this? Do you know what you do to me when you kiss me and tell me how much you love me? You fall asleep against me asking for nothing but comfort and warmth. You wake up with me even on your days off, just to see me off. You know the perfect times to call me during the day. You tell me the sweetest, most adorable things I’ve ever had the pleasure to hear. You’ve seen me at my highest and my lowest. Not once have you turned the other way. I feel as if you understand every part of me.  
I pull your legs tighter against me. How can I be closer to you? I can hear your quiet breaths as you try to fall back to sleep. I lean back as much as I can and reach for a blanket to wrap around you. “My sweetheart, what did I ever do to deserve you…” I kiss your face as gently as I can. You hum in response. You must be awake enough to hear me. I am so desperate to reach underneath your pajamas and feel your skin beneath my fingers. I refuse myself that one pleasure, though. I want to be your lawful husband before I unwrap the present you are.  
“Jumin…” you call, wrapping your arms around me.  
“What is it?”  
“I love you.”  
That’s it. That’s all I need to destroy these tangled threads I feel wrapped around my heart right now. Your love. Your innocence and kindness. Your everything. “I love you,” I say. I promise you this, I will do all that I can in my every ounce of power to love you and cherish you. I can’t get enough of you. From the way you smell to the way your voice makes my heart race, to the way you love me, to your every thought.  
I love you. I’ve never loved anyone like this before. I’ve never witnessed anything like this before. I’ve watched my fathers relationships to V’s and Rika’s. Nothing compares to this. I can release myself from the perfect façade and drop the prince’s clothing at your feet and you still hold your arms wide open for me. You’ve loved me throughout my changes, my every step. You’ve loved me through all of my decisions, trusting me wholeheartedly. You’re too good to be true. You deserve everything. I can’t bare to part from you. I dread the days when I’ll have to be away for business trips too stressful to take you along with me. I dread the long hours that keep me from you. I dread the fitful nightmares that keep me from sleeping against you. I don’t want to ever part from you. I want to kiss you and hold you, roll around the bed all day, not a thought in my head besides you.  
I know once the sun rises I will fall back into my more logical thinking, but right now I am still caught up in my worries. The fact that you are in my arms, my lap, my bed, and my home is all I need though. How could I ask for anything else? Wear my ring and I am okay enough to let you leave my side. You are my blessing from above. My living, breathing heart. You are everything I have been missing, desiring, needing. You are what makes me a better man. You deserve the world.  
I promise to make our own world behind these closed doors. Our own space. Our home. I need you and I am happy with whatever you may want in life. Whatever path you take, take me too. I ask for nothing but you. I love you.


End file.
